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Archive for the ‘On Your Spiritual Journey’ Category

I will not quit.

I will not quit on myself.

I will not quit on my healing.

I will not quit on my health.

I will not quit on my journey.

I will not quit on my friendships.

I will not quit on my relationships.

I will not quit socially blossoming.

I will not quit in my pursuit of spiritual growth.

I will not quit in the creation of my spiritual foundation.

Because I am not a quitter.

I will persevere.

I will continue to become more confident.

I will heal my heart and my soul.

I will reach a point where I am confident in my physical body.

I will find content in my physical body.

I will find perfection in me.

I will heal, develop, and welcome old and new friendships

I will have a loving, thoughtful, deep, passionate relationship

Because life isn’t living without passion.

I will enjoy people to their fullest potential.

I will continue to learn and grow.

I will remain an observer.

I will be mindful of myself.

I will be mindful of others.

I will continue to give of myself.

I will rely and reference my faith throughout this journey.

I will be positive.

I will be happy.

I will bring all of these wonderful affirmations to the world.

I will do all of this because it is a part of who I am.

I will be patient, I will persevere.

I will be me, Brittany.

and I will be loved by myself and by others.

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I have exercised all day and have not found ease in a breath, how unusual.

I have sat in silence for an hour and still hear the roar of a city between my ears.

I am wound up, tired out, but still searching.

I am sitting despite the fact that I am cold.

I hoped that I could sit here until the sun came out and warmed my body.

I would sit until a significant thought would carry me back down the trail.

I am sitting with my back to the view of the lakes.

I tell myself, Turn around Brittany, but I can’t.

It is as if I am waiting for a fellow friend to come up the trail.

I will offer them a hug, say, Hello, my friend, and think to myself- I was waiting for you.

I feel unfiltered and raw but not like a gross Andy Warhol spin-off.

I feel present but this time there are no layers to peel away.

There is nothing to hide. No one to think about. Nothing to overcome.

Is this freedom?

I haven’t had this before. This sense of self.

I have always been alone but I am here, alone but feel connected.

No feeling of solitude.

Connected to myself, and I am O.K.

I feel like I am supposed to be thinking of something but my mind is blank.

Beautifully blank.

I don’t need to think. I don’t need to feel.

Just need to be. Just need to write.

I can’t feel my pulse and I remember feeling it all the time.

Is it because it is so far beneath the surface of me?

Have I mistaken it as a non-vital?

I hope the next stage of life is about letting my pulse radiate like waves of energy.

Waves of energy on the shore of a blank canvas.

I could live only from the heart- I used to be good at that.

A long time ago- breathing came easily to me.

These are the right steps.

You’re on your way home.

If connection is what you want, Britt, then you will find it.

If the trees could talk they would say, Brittany, we are getting to know you.

I am winding down now.

An eyelash just landed on my hand.

I’ll make a wish on it even if the eyelash isn’t my own.

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“It takes giving everything you ever wanted and then losing it to know what truth really means. When the people I used to know found out what I had been doing, how I had been living. They asked me why, but there’s no reason talking to people who have a home. They have no idea what its like to seek safety in other people, for home to be wherever you lay your head.

I was always an unusual girl. My mother told me I had a chameleon’s soul. No moral compass pointing due North. No fixed personality, just an inner indecisiveness that was as wide and as wavering as the ocean.

And if I said I didn’t plan for it to turn out this way I’d be lying, because I was born to be the other woman. I belonged to no one who belonged to everyone. Who had nothing, who wanted everything. With a fire for every experience and an obsession for freedom that terrified me to a point that I couldn’t even talk about and pushed me to a nomadic point of madness.”

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Moving to a new place poses more challenges than just the physical labour of hauling furniture and stuffing carloads until your tire axles wine and complain. There is the longing to start your new life while still being able to maintain your relationships from the past. The emotional layers of moving penetrate our spiritual lives through the subtle movements and changes of the subconscious self. Though challenging it is also very rewarding. If you are ready and willing you may find yourself diving deeper within and preparing for something much greater.

And isn’t this the purpose of life, of growth and of human beings?

My recent move has opened my heart and mind to a life of unforeseen changes. A spirit inside me drove me to pack up and relocate but a greater being knew I was capable and guided me to this place where I would continue to evolve into someone great.

Although I am unaware of the end results I am persistent in the free informal education.

What are these lessons?

For me, it has began with learning about people. It is about winning and influencing those around me to create a community which I desire to dwell in. Fortunately I am not alone in this process, I am in fact accompanied by Dale Carnegie author, and fellow pursuant. The principles that he offers are intangible and by the end of his book I would like to help others generate these principles on their own so that they also adopt and alter their own lives. What keeps me intrigued? The reactions and actions of those around me as well the reward of knowing that this higher level of thought and living will allow all ships to float.

The next lesson has evolved from my decision and commitment to being happy. This is easier than most believe. I think it comes down to perspective. A commitment to happiness also means a commitment to continuously developing new perspectives. Those which allow you to enjoy, enjoy, ENJOY whatever it is you encounter. This can be done in a number of ways, maybe through relationships or adventures, maybe more awareness, effort more gratitude and more appreciation. The commitment looks and feels different every day and isn’t that wonderful? The fuel is the feeling of becoming and the warm acceptance from those who welcome and admire your constant rebirth.

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A Life That Matters

Ready or not, someday it will all come to an end.

There will be no more sunrises, no minutes, hours or days.

All the things you collected, whether treasured or forgotten, will pass to someone else.

Your wealth, fame and temporal power will shrivel to irrelevance.

It will not matter what you owned, or what you were owed.

Your grudges, resentments, frustrations, and jealousies will finally disappear.

So, too, your hopes, ambitions, plans, and to-do lists will expire.

The wins and losses that once seemed so important will fade away.

It won’t matter where you came from, or on what side of the tracks you lived, at the end.

It won’t matter whether you were beautiful or brilliant.

Even your gender and skin colour will be irrelevant.

So what will matter? How will the value of your days be measured?

What will matter is not what you bought, but what you built;
not what you got, but what you gave.

What will matter is not your success, but your significance.

What will matter is not what you learned, but what you taught.

What will matter is every act of integrity, compassion, courage or sacrifice,
that enriched, empowered or encouraged, others to emulate your example.

What will matter is not your competence, but your character.

What will matter is not how many people you knew,
but how many will feel a lasting loss when you’re gone.

What will matter is not your memories,
but the memories that live in those who loved you.

What will matter is how long you will be remembered,
by whom and for what.

Living a life that matters doesn’t happen by accident.

It’s not a matter of circumstance, but of choice.

 

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If you decide what you want for your future right now, you are trapping yourself into wanting that same thing down the road. Deciding what you want right now does not allow for you to change your mind or want something different although you might change or the situation and circumstances might turn out differently.

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The truth behind other people causing you harm or hurt is that you have allowed the locus of control to move from within you to an external something or someone. Don’t give them that power over you any longer. In the center of your universe is you. You have the choice to to rule or to be ruled. Giving away your power does not help others, in fact it only hurts them too. Especially if they are using it against you. There doesnt seem to be any positivity in that  type of situation. Maintain the source power, not because you need to have control, but because it allows you to constantly be searching for higher thoughts, for good feelings and for a vibrational frequency that allows for the universe to manifest events and a world built on desire and love.

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